I Didn't Want Kids From Different Dads

Yes, Let's Go There.

There was a point years ago when it seemed like people just stopped getting married. There were no engagement announcements, and everyone had negative thoughts about marriage. I remember even posting a Facebook status asking my friends if they still believed in marriage. However, there were a lot of babies being born. 

Now, please know I am NOT JUDGING or throwing shade because I’m not innocent by any means. So, I just kept seeing pregnancy announcements coming left and right. Shortly after that, there was a lot of drama. With either the child's mother or the child's dad, and yes, people were putting their business out there for everyone to read. And it all just seemed like a mess. 

Photo by Nihal Karkala on Unsplash

So much so that I told myself I didn’t want kids from two different fathers. All I thought about was not wanting to deal with drama or having one kid be in one place and my other kid somewhere else. I thought it was too much. 

Let me give you some context about my past. I got pregnant young and out of wedlock, and my daughter’s father and I decided the best thing at that time was to get married. Clearly, lesson learned that when you have issues before a baby, those issues intensify after the baby is born, and marriage isn’t a bandaid to cover all those issues up. (Now, I’m throwing judgment and shade at myself.) So, that marriage wasn’t healthy, and we ended up divorcing. 

Fast forward to my now husband; when we started dating, we agreed that we didn’t want any more children. He had a son, and I had my daughter, and we were okay with that. I never told him one of the reasons I didn’t want another kid was because I didn’t want kids from different dads. I had plenty of other reasons why I didn’t want another one, but I never brought this one to light. 

However, after my grandfather passed, I had this urge to want another baby. It took some convincing my husband because we had agreed no more babies. But eventually, he said yes. I prayed, had a miscarriage, stopped trying, and then started trying again, and then we got pregnant in April of 2021! 

It’s ridiculous to look back and think about where my mind was at and how I was so sure I would make sure I didn’t have kids from different dads. Ha! Let me laugh at myself now because life happens, circumstances change, and our minds change. I absolutely love my husband, and I am so in love with our little family. And I look at my two blessings of kids, and I cannot believe at one point, I didn’t want this because I “thought it would be messy.” 

I think my message in all this is that life happens, and as we grow older, our minds might change, and that’s okay! 

Can you think of a time when you were set on one decision but eventually changed your mind? 

With Love, Heidy 

P.S. I want to write more personal content like this. However, it will be for paid subscribers. If interested, consider supporting my writing by upgrading to a paid subscription. Thank you. 

P.S. If you need a copywriter for writing services or looking to launch a podcast – let’s get in touch; I want to create with you!