My Mind is Playing Tricks on Me

Photo by Dim Hou on Unsplash

She tells me I’m not pretty. 
That I’m not worthy.
That I have no friends and no one likes me,
She tells me I should quit. Everything.
She makes me question why I do what I do.
She brings self-doubt and surfaces the self-sabotage. 

My mind tells me I’ll never reach my goals. 
That I’m wasting my time. 
She makes me compare myself to others. 
She tells me that my efforts are useless no matter how hard I work.

My mind is playing tricks on me. 
Why does my mind play games? 
These words hurt. They bring down my energy. 

Why doesn’t my mind love me? 

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I was at a networking event this past Thursday; I was one of the speakers and presented my business and the services I provide. The speaker before me owned a business consulting company. And she talked about how mindset will make or break your success in your business. Then she showed this quote:

“Whatever the mind of man can conceive and believe, it can achieve.” -Napoleon Hill

She said, if you think you can achieve something, you will; if you think you can’t, you won’t.

And immediately, I thought about the poem above; I had written it a few days before this event. I’ve struggled with negative thoughts for a while now. And every self-help book, financial literacy book, or personal development book I’ve read all mention how you can achieve anything you put your mind to.

I have days where I’m like at a high – I feel like I can conquer the world, I’m motivated, determined, and excited for the next steps, and then a day or two later, it comes crashing down. I start to doubt and question everything. I start to get discouraged and think that all my efforts are worthless.

“My name will never be brand; my podcast won’t reach my target audience; people don’t care about what I’m doing; I can’t write for others; what am I thinking? No one cares what I write about.”

I start to want to throw everything out the window and give up. God bless my husband because I’m sure he is tired of me through these waves. Although I do have these negative thoughts, I keep going. My podcast is now one year old, I have been writing for ten years, and I don’t see myself ever stopping. I don’t see myself not writing or not podcasting. And I do see myself helping others with their copywriting and launching their podcasts.

If you also have negative thoughts like this, please know you are not alone. And let’s practice together what apostle Paul's advice in Philippians 4:8 NIV:

“Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable – if anything is excellent or praiseworthy- think about such things.”

Let’s shift our focus to the positive.

With Love, Heidy