Are Your Friends of the Same Ethnic Background as You?

If Yes, Why?

May 13, 2024

five human hands on brown surface — Photo by Clay Banks on Unsplash

I’ve written before about the (in)courage Bible study series, “Create in Me a Heart of ____,” there is hope, peace, wisdom, and mercy. These Bible studies are SO GOOD! And I’ll probably continue to write and talk about them because they’ve helped my faith grow stronger and deeper in God.

But today’s question comes from the Wisdom Bible study - Create in Me a Heart of Wisdom, and on week one, day two, it goes deeper, talking about knowledge - because the theme of week two is wisdom is learned through understanding knowledge.

The verse for this day is Proverbs 18:15 (NIV), “The heart of the discerning acquires knowledge, for the ears of the wise seek it out.” The first question is, “How does knowing more about God, yourself, and others give you wisdom for life? And to me the Bible gives me understanding and the blueprint for how to treat people, being more like Jesus, right? And we are built for connections and relationships, whether our families, friends, or partners.

It then talks about how we need knowledge to grow in wisdom, and knowing more about God, ourselves, and others helps us form a deeper understanding of each. And thennnnnnn it says,

“When we see ourselves reflected in another person’s face and stories, we’re humbly reminded that we, too, are flesh and blood, made in God’s image and therefore deserving of love and dignity just like everyone else. And when we understand the depth of God’s sacrificial love for humanity, we can learn how to love others as He loved us. When we spend time with people who have different family backgrounds, cultural customs, and church traditions, we get to experience a broader view of God’s multifaceted nature and creativity.”

That last sentence made me write in the margins, “Are Your Friends of the Same Ethnic Background as You?” and was the prompt for this newsletter post because that is deep.

There are so many things I want to say, but let me start with - everyone is made in the image of God. God loves everyone! And there is no one above you or beneath you, just like you aren’t above anyone or beneath you - God loves all His children. If you are a parent of multiple children, you’ll understand that you can’t love one child more than the other; you love them differently because they are different. This is how God loves His children.

Next, your mind expands when you have friends with different backgrounds, upbringings, cultural traditions, faiths, etc.. You aren’t in a little bubble where everyone does the same thing, thinks the same way, or acts the same. You’ll be exposed to another way of doing things or seeing things, and sometimes, you’ll be exposed to some injustices that happen to certain people.

I firmly believe storytelling is powerful because it can change the world. When you hear someone’s story, two things may happen:

You’ll relate because you’ve been through someone similar and feel seen and less alone.
You’ll learn about another person's experience that you haven’t gone through before, but it doesn’t mean it doesn’t exist because it hasn’t happened to you or anyone around you. (Hence, it is important not to live in a bubble.)

But for some people, in order to be around others who are different from you, you’ll need to be intentional about it. You’ll need to get out of your neighborhood and circle of friends and truly out of your comfort zone. However, I promise it will make you a better person, broaden your worldview, and help you grow closer to God and appreciate His love for us.

I was fortunate enough to grow up with a mixture of people from different backgrounds than me. So, I learned about different cultures and shared my culture with others. Because of this, I’m empathetic towards people of various ethnicities. Also, being a child of immigrants also plays a significant role in this.

So, I leave you with this today: Look at your friends and who you mostly hang out with. Are they of the same ethnic background as you? If so, how can you intently seek out being around people different from you?

One thing that comes to mind is attending a new church where they have a congression that is mixed with different ethnicities. Bri Stensrud writes about doing this in her book Start with Welcome. The background story is that once Russia invaded Ukraine, women in the organization she directed, Women of Welcome, were asking how they could help Ukrainians. She writes:

“One suggestion we made was to show solidarity with Ukrainians by simply showing up on a Sunday morning and sitting in the service of a local Ukrainian church. Yes, you could send something to a humanitarian charity, but we felt getting close to people was also important. Suggesting this to our online community felt disingenuous unless I did it myself, so I searched online for a Ukrainian congregation in Colorado Springs. I had such a lovely experience at a local Slavic evangelical church that I started visiting other immigrant congregations in various parts of town.”

Into My Thoughts

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