How My Enneagram Six Type Has Played out in My Life
Do You Know Your Enneagram Number?
I had just heard of Enneagram when I applied for an internship for one of my favorite podcasts. One of the questions on the application was, “What is Your Enneagram Number?” The following statement was, “If you don’t know your number, take the test here.” So, I took the test. Towards the end of this internship, I saw an opportunity for another internship and applied.
One of the questions on the application was, “What is Your Enneagram Number?” I thought, “This must be a Christian thing.” What a coincidence that two women I follow on Instagram with a faith-based brand and an internship program ask for the Enneagram number for their applicants. Come to find out that one of them has their coaching clients also take the test because the Enneagram is a tool that shares strengths and weaknesses for each number.
The Enneagram shares strengths and weaknesses, helps you see yourself at a deeper level, and can help you develop and increase your self-awareness. It describes why you feel, think, and behave in certain ways because the base is upon core desires and fears.
History
So, what exactly is the Enneagram? According to Truity.com, it’s a system of personality types that shows how people interact with the world around them and how they manage their emotions. There are nine personality types, each of which maps to a nine-point diagram, illustrating how each type relates to one another.
According to the Enneagram Institute, Oscar Ichazo was the person who originally created the system. He was born in Bolivia but raised in Peru and then moved to Argentina to learn from a school of inner work.
How Does It Work?
Each type is assigned a number, one through nine. No one number will describe an individual's personality perfectly, nor is one number better than another, and people may relate to more than one number. However, the concept is that people do not change from one number to another; they relate to different traits depending on their levels of health.
Enneagram Six: The Loyalist
My enneagram type is six, also called the loyalist. Six is the committed security-oriented type, and we are engaging, responsible, anxious, and suspicious. The name loyalist was given to Sixes because we are the most loyal to friends and beliefs. According to the Enneagram Institute, sixes will “go down with the ship” and hang on to relationships for longer than the other types, all kinds of relationships.
The loyalists' reason is the basic fear of abandonment and being left without support. Sixes struggle with making important decisions, but we don’t want anyone else to make them for us. Once Sixes finds someone they can trust, they will maintain that connection no matter what.
Strengths of Sixes:
Responsible choices
Honoring commitments to plans and people
Caring for others
Recognize other perspectives
Weaknesses of Sixes:
Difficulty controlling anxious thoughts
High levels of insecurity
Struggle with important life decisions
Expect the worst outcome
How Six Has Played Out In My Life
I wrote about knowing oneself and discussed different personality tests. At first, I wasn’t too fond of them because I didn’t think they were accurate; however, reading about sixes, I’ve realized I’ve seen these traits play out throughout my life.
First, let’s start with the name the Sixes have - the loyalists, that is me! I remember telling my husband about my previous relationship and all the crap I put up with, and he replied, “Man, you were loyal.” But I wasn’t sure if that was a good thing or a bad thing. And just like the description says, sixes will hold on to relationships for too long; that’s precisely what I’ve done in the past. Not just in my previous romantic relationship but in friendships too!
I have struggled to make important decisions all my life. The first major life decision I remember struggling with was moving back to my hometown six months after I had moved to Florida. My family had moved to Florida the year prior, and I stayed back for college, but I didn’t like Florida and felt lonely and out of place. The decision to move back wasn’t an easy one; I was torn, and eventually, I did end up leaving and hurting my father.
Now, I just realized that I lied, and that wasn’t the first major decision I struggled with. The first major decision I struggled with was deciding what career path to take. This took me years to figure out, and today, I am a medical coding analyst, which I had no idea was even a career when I graduated high school.
Strengths and Weaknesses
Reading over Sixes's strengths and weaknesses perfectly aligns with mine. Let’s start with the strengths.
Once I make a decision, I feel like they are responsible choices. Even though I’ll break my head and go back and forth beforehand, eventually, it’s the right choice.
When I say I’m going to do something - I do it. If I make a plan with someone, I follow through unless something happens out of my control, but I do not cancel plans just because I don’t feel like going any longer or for no reason at all.
I care for others hard! Once you’ve gained my trust and consider you a friend, I will be there for you no matter what!
I love listening to other people’s perspectives. When listening to someone’s problem, I try to see things from a different angle, usually positively.
Let’s continue with weaknesses.
I indeed have issues with controlling my anxious thoughts. Once my mind gets going, it’s hard to stop it from going into a rabbit hole or the worst-case scenario immediately.
I have high levels of insecurities, which I’m currently working on.
I’ve already discussed the struggles with life decisions, LOL.
And yes, I expect the worst possible outcome, although I do hope for the best!
Let’s Hear From An Enneagram Coach
Forbes Health states that studies have shown that Enneagrams can be helpful for both personal and spiritual growth. Let’s hear from an enneagram coach about how she uses them as a tool for her clients.
Hi, I’m Annie Woods, and I am an Enneagram, Human Design, and “Get sh*t done” coach for overwhelmed humans who are tired of cookie-cutter and one-size fits all advice. I’m thrilled to write about one of my favorite topics, The Enneagram. This larger-than-life personality system entered my life and smacked me upside the head the moment I identified with my leading type. Since the winter of 2018, I have used this tool to support my personal growth and that of ALL of my clients, and here’s why:
I am not my enneagram type; I have a type.
You will see memes describing behaviors and hear people talk about how they’re this number or that number, and it will give you an idea of how people are showing up in their lives. What I love about the enneagram is that it also shows me how I CAN show up if I choose the path of understanding myself, my motivations, and my fears.
If you want to read about my journey with the enneagram and how I ended up depressed for two weeks, check out the essay I wrote on the topic. In the meantime, here’s what makes it so powerful:
Where most personality tests are behavior-based, the Enneagram focuses on the way we view the world. It is not about what you do but WHY you do it; that’s a powerful distinction to me.
Even though the memes and the need to type everyone you come across are part of most people’s journey with The Enneagram, this dynamic tool is most useful when we navigate it with curiosity and learn how to embrace every aspect of self that it gifts us. Often, your type’s most significant strength will be your type’s most prominent challenge if you’re operating from fear rather than love.
If you take nothing else from this piece, let it be this: Your personality is not your destiny; if there is something in your life that’s not working, with awareness and support, you can move into a version of yourself that is authentic, imperfect, and absolutely freaking worthy.
Beautifully said, Annie! Thank you so much for your contribution to this article and your work. Here is how you can connect with Annie:
With Love, Heidy
P.S. If you need a copywriter for writing services or are looking to launch a podcast – let’s get in touch; I want to create with you!
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